School librarians agreed to remove all Bibles from the premises.
Local mother Tracy Alford, whose Instagram bio reveals she has stars both on her flag and in her eyes, left the rest of the Parent Teacher Association stunned when she commandeered the mic earlier this week and read,
How fair and how pleasant art thou, O love, for delights!
This thy stature is like to a palm tree, and thy breasts to clusters of grapes. I said, I will go up to the palm tree, I will take hold of the boughs thereof: now also thy breasts shall be as clusters of the vine, and the smell of thy nose like apples; And the roof of thy mouth like the best wine for my beloved, that goeth down sweetly, causing the lips of those that are asleep to speak.
I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me.
Come, my beloved, let us go forth into the field; let us lodge in the villages. Let us get up early to the vineyards; let us see if the vine flourish, whether the tender grape appear, and the pomegranates bud forth: there will I give thee my loves.
The meeting promptly spiraled out of control, to Alford’s vindication. She remarked, “You have messed with the wrong momma bear this time. If we can’t protect our children from this kind of grooming poetry, what are we even doing here?” To avoid the risk of a media firestorm, school administration agreed that all existing school copies of the Bible would be immediately disposed of.
