If he out-riddles me, I’ll have to take his mantle and become the new Great Pumpkin until I can find another worthy pumpkin patch.
Oh no! I played fast and loose with my riddling this year and now the Great Pumpkin is here for the Halloween reaping! My first few years growing my pumpkin patch, I was so diligent– watering every day, and memorizing new riddles every night just in case the Great Pumpkin came calling. But he never did! So you know how it goes. I let the watering take priority over the riddling. Exactly what they warn you not to do when buying pumpkin seeds! It’s the recipe for an unbalanced harvest.
But now the Great Pumpkin is here and I’m pulling a blank! If he out-riddles me, I’ll have to take his mantle and become the new Great Pumpkin until I can find another worthy pumpkin patch. I hear his giant pumpkin head call through the fog:
As the veil thins, the answers grow dim,
The reaping of riddles is soon to begin!
Tell me a puzzle on this Hallow’s Eve.
Stump my vine or a pumpkin you’ll be!
This is not looking good. I can’t become the Great Pumpkin at a time like this. For starters, I have a thing next weekend. Honestly, I don’t know why I insist on growing such a high-maintenance gourd– there’s no giant butternut squash that comes calling if you plant those.
I clear my throat. “A man and his son get into a terrible car accident—”
….
Editor’s note: We were unable to contact the author of this article following publication, after he mysteriously disappeared in his pumpkin patch.
