Time to buy a Christmas tree every month until it’s Christmas.
Everyone’s looking forward to freezing temperatures, cold winds, ice on the pavement and grit on the roads. We can’t give you all of those fun things, but we can give you lots of adornments that will make it feel like an Oh-so-cheery, frigid winter scape of jolly gloom.
Hang our plastic icicle lights around your eves and you’ll shiver every time you leave the house, even though the temperatures aren’t freezing…yet.
Nothing says summer in winter like a Christmas wreath. Dark green, light green—your trees and shrubs will soon be brown and leafless, but your plastic wreath will always be in bloom. Buy one in October to convince yourself that it’s already next summer, even though this one only just finished.
Our fake firs come in several styles, all of them unreasonably symmetrical, some of them in natural colors. And all with twinkly colored lights, just like in nature. Why no real trees? It’s not because it’s too early (it’s never too early), it’s because we pulped all the real ones so you could have…festive wrapping paper! Because someone in the family must have a birthday in the second half of the year. Why buy two different types of paper?
Everyone knows someone that’s had a giant inflatable Santa blow away in a cold winter wind. Buy one now and put it up in your garden before the windy season starts. All your neighbors will appreciate your being Christmassy before Thanksgiving.
You can’t wait, so why should you?
