For example, checking out the local Costco anytime he goes on vacation, just to see what they have… Just my dad?

Science has attempted to conquer the frontier of dad brains, and science has failed. A new report concludes that researchers were unsuccessful in mapping the difference between weird things all dads like and weird things only your dad likes. Although all dads sampled displayed strong evidence of weird behavior, the idiosyncrasies sometimes followed a pattern, and sometimes spread all over the map.

Stumped trend analysts released the following list of strange dad favorites that could apply to all dads or just your dad, depending on the day. 

  • Imprinting on one type of fruit and incorporating that fruit into every dish they make, insisting that “mango goes with everything.” 
  • Turning every basic homework question into a three-hour math lesson that dramatically exceeds anything you will need to learn that year, or even for the rest of high school
  • Learning how to sew in order to make a homemade Halloween costume for the dog, while growing up you always had to make yours by yourself out of dress up clothes and cardboard boxes 
  • Allegedly having one close longtime friend who is not your mom, despite the fact that there is no evidence that this man has ever existed. He shares the same name as your dad and “lives in Canada.” 
  • Sending an annual text to the family group chat to commemorate the knee surgery he got in 2011
  • Sending a daily text to the family group chat to remind everyone that the $7 credit available in the Amazon prime account is his, so nobody use it.

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